The Naked Intelligence Officer Universal Declaration of Humint Rights Secrets of 9/11 (Recently unclassified!) Spaiku! (CIA haiku poetry from the Covert Comic! "Spooky" - USA Today) Black Matters (The world's most classified poetry) Intelligence Underground (Spookiest of the spooks) Copyright 1998-2024. All rights reserved. |
The Covert Comic Weekly Intelligence Briefing
(Note: Cleared readers only, please.) If spies are the eyes and ears of a prince, a
good intelligence analyst is his olfactory system. ●
The James Bond character has been portrayed by seven different actors.
In real espionage, a competent ops officer is portrayed by way more
actors than that.
●
FACT CHECK: No, Fact Checkers Won’t Hurt You (If You Do What We Say) ●
A co-worker told me she’s terrified of drinking because she doesn’t want
to end up like her parents.
I said “Your parents are alcoholic?” She said
“No, they’re parents.” ● Every picture is actual size.
Executive
Intelligence Summary In space no one can hear you scream. But except for that, Earth and space are way different.
Briefing Capitol Hill to support informed
policymaking is like becoming a taxidermist so you can work with
animals. ●
Back when I started
at CIA, every male officer was required to wear a coat and tie to work.
… On the other hand, that was
all
we were required to wear. ●
“Before we begin, let me set expectations for this meeting.” Takes out wireless handheld expectation setter,
types on keypad. “OK, let’s get started.” ● How you garnish the strips of meat you cut
from the dead bodies of passengers in the plane you were flying on that
crashed in a remote mountain range is the real you. ● If I
think for one minute that I’m the kind of person who would have sex with
me on the very first date, then I’m sadly mistaken.
Executive
Intelligence Summary
Which mask to
wear, which wear to mask.
Homeland Security
Update:
If you see a sign that says ‘If you see something, say something,’ it is
not necessary to contact the Department of Homeland Security to say you
saw this. ● ‘Calling in an airstrike’ may sound good, but it doesn’t address the deeper issues underlying the conflict (for that you typically need to call in multiple airstrikes). ● What’s the smoke signal for ‘smoke signal’? ●
‘Umpteenth’ sounds like a lot, but it’s really just the number ump + 10. ●
Whenever I read that quote
by Hemingway, “Always do sober what you said you’d do drunk,” I have a
drink!
Executive
Intelligence Summary It's only jaw-dropping if your mouth isn't
already agape.
The Covert Comic. Read him while you still can!
|