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The Covert Comic

Weekly Intelligence Briefing


(Note: Cleared readers only, please.)

The Covert Comic.  Helping you realize your fool potential!

  At CIA, there's a fine line between getting blown and getting blown.

  I haven't the slightest idea – but I'm working to make my ideas slighter and slighter every day.

  Women to me are an open book.  Now if I could just figure out what all those words on the pages mean.

  Transcendent Typo 110225.  Our goal is in sighs.

Executive Intelligence Summary

When exercising your rights, there's nothing more beneficial than the burpee.




There's less done in secret that should be made public than vice versa.

  Where I work, faces are known to get people transplants.

  I love Earth Day, when every April 22nd people from diverse backgrounds come together to bury an environmentalist alive.

  Remember when Captain Kirk asked that computer a series of paradoxical questions and made it start smoking? I can do that to my mom at will.

  My boss: "If everyone's thinking alike, someone isn't thinking."

     Me: "My thoughts exactly!"

Executive Intelligence Summary

The ultimate four-letter word is 'I.'




The world is one big back room.

  Real ops officers don't have weapons built inside their golf clubs, they have golf clubs built inside their weapons.

  Everything is made of atoms.  Atoms are 99.9% nothing.  I know nothing.  Therefore I know 99.9% of everything.

  Literary regionalism is the description, through a weaving of dialect, characters and customs, of why you don't want to live in that region.

  I've been to paradise and I've been to me.  I'll take paradise.

PostTopSecret of the Week

From PostTopSecret


The Covert Comic officially isn't on Twitter.



Blow Your Cover!

Nothing says "I can neither confirm nor deny that I regularly read the Covert Comic" like a genuine Covert Comic bumper sticker.

Create your own covert action!  [Officially don’t] purchase and affix these stickers to the bumpers of CIA or FBI counterintelligence officers’ cars, street signs in heavily traveled areas of Georgetown, cubicles at the Defense Intelligence Agency, the back of Air Force One, etc.

Stickers are standard 3x10 inch, full color, and are shipped promptly and secretively via First-Class Mail (no shipping fee!).  Price: $10.  Allow 2-3 weeks for delivery.

(Note: An ultra-classified portion of proceeds from the sale of Covert Comic bumper stickers goes to Fisher House, a tax deductible charity providing lodging and other support to families of wounded US military personnel.  ... And you're right, lady, I am arrogant and self-serving.)





Can't we all just coexist?







The Covert Comic.

Read him while you still can!