|
War On Terror! (Secret archives, volume one) War On Terror! (Secret archives, volume two) War On Terror! (Secret archives, volume three) Secrets of 9/11 (Recently unclassified!) The Naked Intelligence Officer Form 22C: Questioning Authority Black Matters (NEW classified poetry from The Covert Comic!) School of Assassins (The first great book of top secret poetry from The Covert Comic. Reviewed in 'Wired!' magazine!) Cointelprose (The second great book of top secret poetry from The Covert Comic. Nearly reviewed in 'Wired!' magazine!) Be a Better Griever (Do it today!) Secrets for Sale! (If you have to ask, you're not cleared yet) PETA: People for the Ethical Treatment of Americans Covert Press Releases (Send them and win!) Spaiku! (CIA haiku poetry from The Covert Comic! "Spooky" - USA Today) Safe-House Proud (Reviewed in About.com! Caution: non-pornography. Adults only) I Killed JFK (The intelligence briefing that started the Covert Comic phenomenon!) The Intelligence Underground: The Spookiest of the Spooks Disclosures (What is Secret Zero?) My Resume or Everything I Know about the CIA and Elvis Intelligence Agents (Links to Covert Comic-approved sites) Copyright 1998-2008. All rights reserved. |
What's NEW with The Covert Comic!
The following chronology details the life of one CIA officer and his personal war on terror.
Monday 5 May 2008 Secret 5281.3. Better to find yourself in a pickle, than the other way around. Received the following e-mail from a reader this week: For all your agency’s alleged exploits in ‘covert ops’, how is it that we the public have never once read about a covert CIA operation aimed at empowering Third World indigenous women? To which I felt compelled to reply: It wouldn’t very well be a covert operation then, would it? ... You're welcome, indigenous women of the Third World!
Tuesday 6 May 2008 If a scientist tells you we humans use only 10% of our brains, whatever you do, don’t laugh – because that could drop us down to like 9.5%. If A loves B, and B loves C, how can it be a love triangle unless C also loves A?
Wednesday 7 May 2008 Inspirational Secret of the Week Secret 5312.1. Better self-absorbed than self-spilling.
Thursday 8 May 2008 In Korea, happiness is a hot puppy. When the Big Bang finally runs its course and space-time begins to contract, your wife will complain about what you're doing before you do it. ... What? Your wife does this already? Oh my God, it’s starting!!!
Friday 9 May 2008 Executive Intelligence Summary They say none of us is as smart as all of us. How come we never say that?
*
Monday 28 April 2008 In the land of the blind, how does the one-eyed man prove he’s king? Now I know how Mata Hari must have felt (assuming Mata Hari's luggage ever got lost in an airport when she was TDY). Good thing I don’t keep secret intel in my personal baggage (not counting those nude photos of Mata Hari). My TDY is almost over - long live my TDY! Honest, America, I can’t wait to get back home, sit on the sofa, and drink while my kids run around in front of the TV. You know, as opposed to sitting here in this hotel room, drinking while someone else’s kids run around in front of the TV. ... Which reminds me of a question I've been meaning to ask for over two weeks now: Whose kids are these, anyway?
Tuesday 29 April 2008 Secret 220.05. Listening to people talk about things that are ‘better than sex’ is worse than sex. Muhammad Ali once said that no Viet Cong ever called him the N-word. Not that it matters, but I checked in a dictionary, and it’s actually the H-word in Vietnamese.
Wednesday 30 April 2008 Inspirational Secret of the Week As a believer in the theory of intelligent design, I see evidence of God’s supreme plan everywhere. For example, the Jesus Lizard, with its large hind feet and flaps of webbed skin between each toe – exactly like Jesus had!
Thursday 1 May 2008 It’s only fair that you get a tax break for contributing to your 401K. After all, you’re donating money to poor people. When I told you to bring me the head of Alfredo Garcia, I implicitly meant: attached to the rest of his body, with Alfredo Garcia alive. I guess I should have been more clear about that.
Friday 2 May 2008 Executive Intelligence Summary I bet invention wishes it was adopted.
The Covert Comic. Read him while you still can!
|