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The Covert Comic

Weekly Intelligence Briefing


... Don't ask.


(Note: Cleared readers only, please.)

Never reject an idea because it challenges conventional ways of thinking.  Reject it because it's an idea.

  SpookSpeak.  Irreversible Corrective Action (ICA).  In the Intelligence Community, a paradigm example of a three-way oxymoron.

  I'm a vegan, but please don't pronounce it vā-gən, because vā-gən sounds like 'bacon', and thinking of bacon makes me wish I wasn't a vegan.

  Secret Scarehead of the Day.  Climatologists Issue New Warning: 'Do Not Mock Us'

  The problem is, I'm in love with you, but you're in love with me.

PostTopSecret of the Week

From PostTopSecret




All counterintelligence is offensive.

  Secret 251170.  Never let power go to your head.  There are much better parts of you for power to go to.

  Couldn't see my therapist today.  The shower cam was too foggy.

  Laughter always pardons … after it has indicted, convicted, condemned and summarily executed.

  Zen of Zuckerberg

There's a limit to

How many times you can change

Your birthdate. – Facebook

Executive Intelligence Summary

When you say 'gratuitous sex and violence,' do you mean as in uncalled for and inappropriate, or as in provided free of charge?




When news breaks, what oozes out?

  In a recent poll at Langley, 62% of ops officers were willing to donate their bodies to science, if granted immunity from prosecution.

  Intelligence Community Dis of the Day: That he's a full professor is as clear as what it is he's full of.

  I refuse to let refusing to let something define me as a person define me as a person.

  They say it's the friend you can call at 4:00 a.m. who matters. You can call me at 4:00 a.m. – just be sure to speak clearly after the beep.

Executive Intelligence Summary

Hand over the nociceptors, and nobody gets hurt.


The Covert Comic officially isn't on Twitter.



Blow Your Cover!

Nothing says "I can neither confirm nor deny that I regularly read the Covert Comic" like a genuine Covert Comic bumper sticker.

Create your own covert action!  [Officially don’t] purchase and affix these stickers to the bumpers of CIA or FBI counterintelligence officers’ cars, street signs in heavily traveled areas of Georgetown, cubicles at the Defense Intelligence Agency, the back of Air Force One, etc.

Stickers are standard 3x10 inch, full color, and are shipped promptly and secretively via First-Class Mail (no shipping fee!).  Price: $10.  Allow 2-3 weeks for delivery.

(Note: An ultra-classified portion of proceeds from the sale of Covert Comic bumper stickers goes to Fisher House, a tax deductible charity providing lodging and other support to families of wounded US military personnel.  ... And you're right, lady, I am arrogant and self-serving.)





Can't we all just coexist?







The Covert Comic.

Read him while you still can!